Deus Ex Machina Part II: Dasein
by Tamuril Telrunye
Summary: Part 2: A desperate struggle for acceptance and sanity in a world not her own. Trapped, Miranda comes to terms with her new prison, and her exacting jailor. Will she find freedom? Or fall to the tyrant of the Grid and his demands.
1. Mise en scen'e

A/N: Yup I'm back with part 2 of the Dues Ex Machina: Dasein. If you're wondering where I get all my neat words? I bought a book of thematic terms for half price, and well... I blame my best friend. It's always her fault. Yup. So, Miranda's back, and towards the end you might actually get some Tron:Legacy. But that is the future. Right now I have quite a bit of time to deal with for Miranda, Clu and poor Tronzler. Don't worry, nothing to risque will happen. Not that Clu wants to hear that, Nutter that he is. First chapter done, second in the works and the rest is in the wind.

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><p><strong>Part 2- Deus Ex Machina: Dasein<strong>

_**By: Tamuril Telrunye A.K.A Bamvivirie**_

**Chapter 1: Mise-en-scen'e**

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><p><em>"If I had a world of my own, everything would be nonsense. Nothing would be what it is, because everything would be what it isn't. And contrary wise, what is, it wouldn't be. And what it wouldn't be, it would. You see?"<em>

_~Alice: Alice in Wonderland_

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><p>When you lose someone, someone you are truly close to. Your heart feels such pain that you often don't know what to do. If you lose such a person violently, one day you catch yourself wishing, the person you loved never existed just so you would be spared the pain. But that does not change the way things are.<p>

If you allow it to, it can easily consume you.

It's harder still, to let it go and become stronger. But I had the time.

Sometimes I would dream I was there.

Back in that office, on the couch in the warm fuzzy half-awake state that I would get when curled up against Flynn.

Warm. Safe. Secure.

And then I wake up.

And I'm here, in this place.

The Grid.

The Grid as Clu made it, not as Flynn created. Not as I'd hoped to know it. No, a place much changed, not that I would have noticed, since I'd never had the chance to see it as it was. But perhaps I should start from where I left off. The portal, the platform and my last chance for happiness slipping away with the light in the sky. My desperate refusal to believe that Flynn was dead, the one fact that I could not and would not accept.

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><p>The wind seemed to whip up out of nowhere, as Rinzler removed an all to familiar looking bundle of rope-like material before binding my hands and hefting me up much like a sack of potatoes, up over his shoulder; Thick shoulder muscles eliciting a grunt from me, as my stomach hit but nothing more.<p>

I was to... Shocked. Too far in denial to even accept that Flynn was dead, let alone that this was happening, and as he marched up the ramp to the recognizer Clu ahead of us Jarvis taking up the rear I couldn't stop myself from looking back. A moment later and the portal mouth was lost to my sight as I was plunked down unceremoniously on one of the many couches, falling sideways from the force.

The material of the couch cushion was soft against my cheek, and I tried desperately to calm my breathing as I fought the urge to cry. A hand grabbed my arm, and I was levered up right again by Rinzler as he started making the strange purring noise again. A hand moved towards my face as he did so, and I couldn't stop the instinctive recoil.

His hand stopped, before moving again index finger moving gently a crossed my face before pulling back wet. Crap, I really am crying. I felt a sob rise in my throat, as Rinzler moved to show Clu the liquid on his fingers.

"Curious," Came from Clu before he moved closer, looking at me as though I were a rare treat "And what would this be called?"

"Wh-" I gulped as a lump seemed to form in my throat, before continuing. "Wh- Whu- What is what?"

"This," He said, moving a finger a crossed my face much less gently then Rinzler before gesturing at it.

"Tears you ninny-hammer." My voice came out broken, but scathing. "I would figure you've seen a lot of crying."

"Crying?"

"Yeah, you know. The result of making someone upset." I rolled my eyes at him in exasperation before dropping my head. "Now fuck off. I don't feel like talking to you, or anyone for that matter."

A hand grasped my hair, forcing my head upwards and my eyes met the cruel glare of Flynn's dopple-ganger.

"Do you know why you're not deleted, User?" Clu said eyes like chips of ice in his head. I had never seen such a cold look on his all too familiar face. "Because I deem you useful to me. You have information, information I cannot get from anywhere or anyone else. If you want to live, I suggest you answer my questions."

"Delete me then," I said, "It would be a mercy."

"There are worse fates then de-resolution on the Grid Miranda." Clu said as his hand slipped from my hair, moving down in a deceptively gentle caress to sit just under my neck, before tightening painfully. "You are a User true. The only User on the grid as far as I know. But that doesn't mean you're indispensable. I could delete you now and not lose a nano of recharge over it. Not a nano."

At this point his grip was so tight I couldn't breathe, and I squirmed under his weight; fighting to breath. Another moment passed like eternity, and before I was allowed gasping breaths again as his hand released its death grip on my throat. I coughed, for a moment simultaneously angry and relieved.

I hadn't wanted him to let go, but I also didn't entirely want to die. No, I wanted to make him pay for this. Make him pay for perverting the grid, for killing Flynn and for denying me the death I wanted so greatly. How dare he!

How dare he take everything from me, than decide my life wasn't worth joining it. My mind ignored the fact completely that I might not want to die for other reasons. I was being selfish, and the rest of the world be damn. I would die, but I would do it on my terms. And I was going to take this egotistical bastard with me when I did it to.

They say two things about revenge, one is that it's petty; the other is that it's a dish best served cold. But when you have nothing else?

No, he would pay for his cruelty and malice. My thoughts strayed too the disk hiding just beneath my own feet, and for a moment I thought I might have him, dead to rights. But no. Even if I could get my arms free, I would still have to contend with Rinzler and Jarvis. No, I would repay him properly. I owed him that much.

"Now," he said, dragging me from my own malice filled thoughts. "Tears."

"Yeah, tears. Users make them."

"Are they dangerous?"

"Not unless you allergic to salt-water." I said scathingly.

"How intriguing." He said turning away. "Users can make water fall from their eyes when they are upset."

"It's not something that happens by choice, and usually when it does happen it isn't just because they are upset." I said, turning away.

"Oh?"

"Yes."

"Explain further." He said voice dangerously soft.

"When a person cries, generally it's because they are under extreme mental duress." I said, letting the hair that had fallen out of the clip settle a crossed my eyes.

"Such as?"

"Pain, sorrow, joy, stress. The list goes on," I paused thinking about my college classes on physiology, before continuing. "Generally, it's a way to gain sympathy. Unintentionally mind you, but sympathy none the less."

"Fascinating." Was all that escaped him as he sat, rolling his fingers around as if trying to get a feel for the tears. Rinzler came close again as his master pulled away, tilting his head to the side like a cat. He stared and I ignored him. Eventually I managed to cry myself quietly into an exhausted state, slumping down against the couch once more.

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><p>Mise-en-Scene:<p>

Meaning: Visual setting and/or the elements of the story that lay out its telling. Usually a thematic term used to describe the quality of the movie and narration. (Meaning varies depending on use.)

In Reference to: Scene, Narration, and main characters.

As a side note, I would like to mention that when I first started writing this chapter my Itunes started playing Adagio for Tron. Irony.

Started: 3-4-11

Finished: 3-5-11


	2. Aphorism

**Deus Ex Macina: Dasein**

_By: Tamuril Telrunye A.K.A Bamvivirie_

**Chapter 2: Aphorism**

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><p><em>Encom C.E.O and video game icon Kevin Flynn as disappeared; he was best known for designing Tron and Space paranoids the two best-selling video games in history. Recently Encom Board members have been troubled by the reports of Flynn's erratic even obsessive behavior. With Flynn missing, the company is now in chaos. Loyal to the end, Bradly maintains his belief that Flynn is not missing; and is instead pursuing his dream of quote 'A digital frontier to shape the human condition.'<em>

_~ Tron: Legacy_

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><p>My exhausted sleep was interrupted by a sudden jolt, as a hand grabbed pulling me upright. My mind still muddled and groggy; unsure as to why I was awakened so suddenly, my body in turn attempted to respond in the way it usually did when threatened, flinging my limbs out in all directions.<p>

But my arms wouldn't move leaden and stiff against the small of my back. No, couldn't move I remembered as a grunt from just in front of me made me shake my head, my mind clearing enough to realize that the sallow looking man in front of me was someone I recognized. But only that, and the hand that was gripping my arm was still attempting to drag me to my feet.

I looked over, and into a darkened helmet with a start before my mind supplied me with a name.

Rinzler.

And reality fell back into place as my mind finally let go of it attempt at sleep, instead focusing on the problem at hand with a startling cold clarity.

"Glad to see you've joined us." Said the cocky assertive voice that should have belonged to my oldest friend.

"I wish I could say the same," I shot back before attempting to get my feet under me, not an easy thing when your body was still refusing to cooperate.

"Are you malfunctioning?" Said the doppelganger as Jarvis picked himself up off the ground, I wished not so secretly that it'd been Clu I'd hit instead. But luck was not with me today. "If you have a virus I will have to purge your systems. I do not know if I could do that to a User... Without off lining them."

"Malfunc- No, I'm tired," I said shaking my head. "When Users don't... Recharge enough, they tend to do strange things. Particularly when they are woken up. I happen to strike out when this happens. Survival instinct. Actually, my automatic reaction to a lot of things is to hit them. "

"Indeed." He said, unconvinced as he moved towards the door, eyebrow raised. Rinzler tugged slightly before we moved forward, Jarvis once more scuttling along behind us. We walked again, down the same corridor that we'd come down previously, passed the same elevator that I'd been certain would be the death of me.

Onward, past the room that I'd first encountered Clu in and further on still. We followed behind Clu as he moved towards an elevator that was different from the first I'd encountered. Guarded on either side by programs in black, with orange markings it seemed to exude a sense of 'go away' that I was not entirely comfortable with.

The door slid open, admitting I, Rinzler and Clu with no problem but closing before Jarvis could even get close. Before the elevator began to climb, shooting through the shaft like a missile before coming to a stop just as suddenly, and opening to a short hallway that in itself ended with yet another door. Stupid maze of doors, and glassy corridors.

At the end of this hallway was yet another door, this one opening to a medium to large sized room. It was furnished in black and orange, it was clearly not the barracks of a soldier, or even for that matter the room of someone like Jarvis. No, this was a Master suite.

Clu's room, if he ever claimed one.

I was shoved towards a couch like object, before being forced to sit. Clu took a regal looking chair not far from my own seat, and I couldn't help but notice that the floor it sat on was raised above the rest of the room a bit. A head... Above the rest.

If I wasn't in such a mortified state, I might actually have laughed about his oversized ego. Or cracked a joke about the fact that I couldn't believe he fit in the room with it. But I was well past laughing at this point, unless it was the hysterical 'she needs to be locked up' sort of laughter.

Silence seemed to blanket the room, broken only by the odd purring noise that seemed to emanate from Rinzler as Clu tapped is fingers against each other. He eyes were locked on me, but I could tell he was seeing something else. As if he was weighing the use I could be, against the trouble I would no doubt provide. I glared at him, daring him to do something.

"Miranda." Came the all too familiar voice and I jolted a bit; I'll be honest and say I wasn't expecting him to speak to me.

"Clu." I returned, venom filling my one word reply.

"We are going to be very busy." And the dread that filled me at those words could not be entirely described, because I could all but feel the truth behind those words.

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><p>The ease of his lie threw him off at first. Small words, thrown at her in the heat of rage. Cruel, unintended, but entirely more effective then he'd hoped possible. The look of defeat in her eyes made him almost feverish with triumph, and Clu knew he had to use this lapse to is advantage.<p>

Her guard was down, making her vulnerable it was now that he had to strike. Clu would exert is influence over this 'perfect' User, and in time he would reroute her loyalty's; in time, she would be his 'Perfect' User. And one cycle, he would walk from the Grid hand in hand with her- to change the User world as was his place, as was his purpose.

In time... Therein lay is predicament, therein existed the one snag in his brief but brilliant plan.

Flynn.

He had to ensure Flynn's influence would not reach her, had to ensure that she remained unaware of Flynn's continued existence. She was connected to him, very strongly connected by User standards. And would leap to his side at a moment's notice, if she was given the chance; She held no loyalty to Clu quite the contrary in fact.

But she was too important to simply offline, contrary to his previous assertions. He had no intentions of derezzing Miranda, not that he was entirely sure he could. Users had ability's that boggled the processors. No, Miranda had to be kept safe. If Flynn or his supporters discovered her, it was over. He would never fulfill his primary purpose, and Miranda would be lost. Perfection gone. No he would not, could not allow this.

If even a normal program found out about her, it would be disastrous. It had been bad enough that she'd been among normal programs before coming to him, he would have to keep her separated from others. For her own safety, and for the sake of perfection he would create. But only until his perfection of the Grid came to fruition, he would keep her away from the dissidents and User Zealots who would no doubt damage her perfection with their glitched ideas.

"Miranda." He said, as a grin grew on his face.

"Clu." Came a quiet, dark reply.

"We are going to be very busy." He said simply.

The Game had changed, and if he was lucky Flynn hadn't even been aware of it.

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><p>Aphorism: A brief elegant statement of principle or opinion, such as "God is in the details" or vice versa.<p>

A/N: A Mini sized chapter, since I decided that I would like the shift to be more apparent. Next chapter shall follow shortly. I felt the quote from the movie was perfect for the beginning of this, and I have the AMV Digital Frontier by: Lightneverfades On Youtube to thank for it. If you like the Tron soundtrack you'll love it, I think. There's also an almost ten minute mix of the soundtrack called Zero Unit that I'm in love with. Should I find it sad that I can tell which track is which in it because I've listened to the soundtrack so much?


	3. Agon

Initial Note: Yeah written awhile back, thanks to all of the people who reviewed. And I'm sorry about all the waiting, life was mugging me something fierce. And please forgive my momentary and sad excuse for humor. I usually like to write lighter and absurd stuffs.

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><p><strong>Deus Ex Macina: Dasein<strong>

_**By: Tamuril Telrunye A.K.A Bamvivirie**_

_**Chapter 3: Agon**_

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><p><em>"Don't touch her; you are covered in a layer of bacteria and LIES!"<em>

_ ~Peter White: Heart no Kuni no Alice_

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><p>"<em>You're so vain; you probably think this song is about you. You're so vain; I'll bet you think this song is about you. Don't you? Don't you?~"<em> I hummed moving toward the odd Grid version of a dresser I grabbed a hair clip twisting my long tresses into a large bun at the back of my head. An oddly improvised clock stood on my dresser, ticking away as I moved my hair around in a small array of ways before curling it back into its normal bun style.

I looked again at the clock with an impatient sigh before turning to pace the floor of my tower room; it was a lengthy process, considering the size of it. The room itself took up the entire top floor of the tower it resided on; cushions and furniture were strewn about in a disorderly manner despite the marked lack of variation that any normal person would enjoy. Three walls out of four were strait glass, or what passed for glass on the Grid. It was clearer than anything you would find in the real world, and tough enough to resist my many varied attempts to break it.

The fourth wall was made of the same black glass material as the rest of the city, containing the elevator, bathroom, and a small area I would deem the kitchen if I were allowed to have anything besides the strait energy that was provided in the many bottles. Taste variation or not, it was all the same stuff, never mind the fact that the 'kitchen' only held glasses and bottles.

Perhaps I should call it a bar then?

Either way, the kitchen area was set off to the right hand side hidden behind a set of black glossy doors that opened once every four hours. Clu kept an eye on my intake, ensuring that I imbibed the substance often enough to keep my body in good condition. In the long years id been here, I'd only stopped eating or rather drinking once.

With Clu, you only get once before he starts trying to find a more efficient way. And by more efficient, I do not mean painless. I caught myself messaging my wrists, and forced myself to stop. The left half of the fourth wall was my bathroom, a hard won victory that Clu still didn't quite understand even after extensive explanation on the grooming habits of female Users.

It was large, contained the necessities- bathtub, shower, toilet, and was completely cut off from the rest of the Grid if I chose to close the sliding door. Or it was in my head anyways, a room I went to when I wanted to pretend that I was merely in a bathroom that belong to someone with darker tastes. Not another world run by a madman that had murdered my best friend in cold blood. Nope.

The fourth wall in my room was both a curse and a blessing, containing the two rooms that made my life more bearable, but also cutting off all access to the elevator that sat between them. Thick impenetrable doors moving together to form a cursedly seamless wall. A seam was a crack, a crack was a fault, and a fault could be exploited. Clu knew this, and also knew better then to allow me such an opening.

I smiled ruefully at the faint smudges on the fourth wall, overly pleased with the words that still managed to endure. I also used the usually glossy surface as an impromptu writing pad; I'd always wanted to write when I was a kid, to bad I'd never had a chance to be published. I rather liked the story I was working on now; it was about young woman who loved to write herself, and was hoping to be published someday.

A movement to my left caught my attention, and I turned to acknowledge Rinzler as he stepped through the formerly featureless wall. A precaution that Clu had in place, to ensure I wouldn't tamper with it if given half a chance.

I moved meeting Rinzler halfway before stalking towards the door, and out into the hallway. Rinlzer kept pace easily enough, and I grimaced as two security programs stepped up to walk in front Of me. The hallway itself was sleek and black, two doorway on one end, only my own on the other. One led to the elevator, the other to a staircase that stood in place in case of emergencies, or sabotage…

No I am not speaking of any time in particular, what would give you such an idea?

The doors to the elevator slid open admitting I and my entourage, before sliding shut again and dropping us down swiftly. I'd long since gotten use to the quick pace, but that didn't mean I had to like it. The door slid open once more as we reached our destination, and I moved forward again with an eagerness that might have frightened anyone who knew where I was headed.

Down yet another black glassy expanse of hallway and into a room that much resembled a game cube. This was our sparring arena; mine and Rinzlers that is. This was how he kept his skills sharp, and how I'd gained mine. One of Clu's better ideas if you asked me…

Not that anyone did. I'd scarcely had contact with anyone since I'd been acquired by Clu, something I didn't believe would change any time soon.

The arena itself was bare of anything that might interfere with our battle, including only a nook for my guards and a room set up and to the left for Clu himself. The security programs moved to their posts within said nook, as the distant sound of marching became apparent. The movement of many feet over the glassy surface, stopping just outside the arena door.

A moment passed before boot steps resumed, and I looked towards the door as Clu entered, flanked on either side by guards. Just behind him scuttled Jarvis, black glossy case clasped in white knuckled hands. In there sat the keys to my freedom- in there sat the missing pieces of my soul. I felt their lack more than I had any right to, to the point that was almost physically bereaved at their absence.

It was an odd distant sort of feeling, like a limb had gone wandering.

A moment passed in which Clu looked at me, before waving Jarvis forward. He opened the case, revealing the velvety plush surface within. My disks winked at me from their perches, humming happily in a way that was almost a welcome, before Clu grasped one and closed the case. He was the only other person to touch my disks, for what reason I couldn't entirely fathom. But the fact that he wanted me to use one today was interesting, he usually only did so when I displeased him, or when he had a bad day.

"I want to see how you've improved, while I've been busy." He drawled eyes excited, twisted grin in place. He had been absent from our daily sparring sessions for quite a while. No doubt due to some trouble from rebels- bet you couldn't tell who I was routing for. "Make me proud, Miranda."

He handed me the disk, before moving towards his box seat as I turned to face Rinzler. I breathed in slowly, counting to seven before breathing out again. I did indeed have two disks again, due to Clu's curiosity. I think it bothered him; not knowing exactly how I managed to use and control two disks at once.

Rinzler was a case of two different codes, coinciding in one body. A bi-polar program if at all applicable, but I was not.

I dodged down and rolled away, avoiding Rinzlers disk by a hair before using the momentum to bring me back to my feet, flinging my disk to the left before leaping up and over the his next disk. Watching as my own bounced violently off the wall, hitting it at just the right angle to send it hurtling at it. Rinzler dodged down, forsaking his disk for safety. Before I grasped my disk, flinging it again as Rinzler barely missed grabbing his disks. Missing one in favor of keeping his hand.

I had to keep him on the defensive, if I had any hope of beating him with just one disk. Dodging left the disk he'd missed catching asit came flying at me, missing by the barest hair. I'd long since learned my lesson about touching disks that didn't belong to me.

My own User code would infect and overwrite any normal programs information; Much like a virus in my own right, if I were being honest. I wouldn't allow any powers I had as a User to affect the life of any program. It was dangerous. Both for me, and them. I was lucky that my code couldn't overtake actual programs. Otherwise Clu would have had an army of me clones. Or worse.

Probably worse. With Clu it could always get worse.

At first it had been very difficult for me to separate the two in my mind. It was like my best friend had been photo-copied, right down to his mannerisms lacking only in the memory department. He had everything he needed to be a fully functioning adult, save for the experience. I had to actively fight my own sense of comfort when I saw him, because I knew I couldn't trust him; at least not in the same way as I trusted Flynn. I could trust him only to be himself, no more no less.

And yet... I couldn't always fight the instinctive calm that I felt when I saw him either. I was continuously fighting myself, part of me (the noble upstanding citizen part that screamed 'Do things right') wanted to kill him on principal. He was destroying the lives of countless people/programs, he had murdered an infinite number of them long before my arrival. This part of me burned to make him accountable for the crimes he was committing. But there was another part of me that just wanted to let it all go, give up and take the easy road.

It wanted to please him, because pleasing him meant he would act the way Flynn always acted. I wanted to curl up against Clu, and accept that as it. I was stuck in the Grid, and I wasn't going to get out no matter how hard I kicked and screamed...

Yet... Yet there was a third part of me; a part of me that frightened me in no small way, a part of me that wanted something, knew something that I couldn't entirely fathom. A shadow me, that was waiting for a time to shift and strike.

But it hadn't always been like this, nooooo initially it was a great deal different. The years of antiseptic like isolation, and lack of outside stimuli had rendered me thus. Not entirely cold, yet not entirely caring either.

I merely existed, no more and no less.

A sort of forced half existence, broken only by my moments of random contemplation; this was a fate worse than death, because death would release me at the very least. I know what you're wondering, what could I have been occupying my time with? And I'll tell you. A great deal of random shit.

Oh, I knew the real reason Clu kept me here, the real reason he kept my disks. He couldn't fool me, no more than he could fool himself. No. He kept my disks because they leaked creation. The leaked my code, my essence, they leaked the free will and uniqueness that made me a User.

It was the same reason he kept me isolated from the rest of the Grid. The same reason that he kept me locked in a tower far removed from all else but himself, Jarvis, and Rinzler.

I by merely being there, made the Grid _Different_.

Different in a way Clu couldn't contend with; different in a way that frightened him. But he also kept me close for the same reason. As far as Flynn could discern, he had been the only User to ever reach the Grid. Understandable considering the fact that Encom had been the only company with the laser technology that he'd used to come here.

The Grid had been built for him, by him for initially his own purposes. He hadn't considered the ramifications of allowing another User access; He probably hadn't really thought of it.

He usually preferred things to work out that way, play the chips as the lay and make the best of it from there. Part of his brilliant problem solving- also part of his brilliant problem. You know, the one that currently kept me locked in a tower like some old fashioned damsel in distress, only replace the word damsel with the word dragon. Then you'll have the correct image I think.

The only problem with his plan of keeping me locked up, was the fact that he couldn't for the self-same reason, keep away from me. He feared change; he feared the change I could bring to the Grid. He feared the change that could ruin his perfection. But he also craved it. And craved my presence, because of it.

He just didn't entirely realize it.

Of course I didn't entirely realize it either, not at first at least. I'd had bigger things occupying my grey matter, like how to escape, and where to go when I did.

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><p><em>My mind wouldn't leave this concept alone, a nagging need to know. The dreaded kitten of curiosity, pawing at the ball of yarn trying in vain to unravel the mystery in front of it.<em>

_ Clu paced back and forth, preoccupied with his plans, always preoccupied by his plan. Why did he even bother to come here? I mean, it isn't like he did anything here that he couldn't out of my company. So why did he bother coming all the way up here when he knew that he wouldn't gain anything from it. Or perhaps he was hoping to gain something from it that I hadn't considered yet?_

_ Clu was always about the angle, no need for emotion to get involved._

_ If he were here to ask me questions about the User world, as he has so often done in the past he would simply state his query (And any resulting questions) before leaving to go about business. But just as frequent, were the visits that resulted in nothing at all. He would pace, I would stare. He would ask me how my day had gone, and I would obliged by either telling him I was bored or telling him an amusing story about just how boring my day had been._

_ Crap, now I had two niggling Kittens of curiosity._

_And only one way to halt them in their tracks._

_ Turning he paced towards the window, turn pace back. Turn pace towards the window, turn pace back. Turn pace towards the window past my bed, and current resting place, turn paced back. Turn pace towards th-POUNCE!_

_ "AHHA!" I shouted as Rinzler leaped to his feet, followed quickly by an uncertain Jarvis. Unexpected move is unexpected. How's them apples? I moved, hand going underneath Clu's shirt like mesh before lifting it up and exposing the toned expanse of flesh that passed for Clu's stomach._

_ "I KNEW IT!" I said, wiggling a bit from my perch on his lap. "No belly button!"_

_ And there was indeed, no belly button to be had. An entirely User feature then, and as I had guessed discarded entirely in the program arsenal of human likeness. Why would programs need belly buttons? They weren't born like us, they were created._

_ Clu cleared his throat bellow me, and I looked up before Rinzler moved closer examining the position that I and Clu were in much as a cat would; Head cocked to the side, not entirely certain of the circumstances._

_ "If I may ask," Clu said, slightly confused "Is this what Users call… Sex?"_

_ I burned red before leaping off him like a scalded cat._

_ "NO!" I said, shaking my head vigorously. "What would give you THAT unfortunate idea?"_

_ "You were on top of me, and panting."_

_ I died on the spot, wishing (and not for the first time) that the tiny Mandy that took up residence in my brain would just shut up and die. Stupid inner voices._

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><p>I twisted left before dropping low to avoid another throw from Rinzler. My muscles bunched, and I felt a familiar burning in them. Not the burning of fatigue, but the rush of adrenaline catapulted to the forefront by the energy that I ate on routine. Not that I would last long anyways, I hadn't taken my daily ration.<p>

I much preferred the light cycle battles anyways; the speed and freedom of movement seemed to feed the primal part of my nature that longed to flee. The part of me that wanted to go far and fast, away from This place. Away from Clu and stolen the face he wore, away from the pain and fear that seemed the permeate my existence in this place.

I was unstoppable and fearless, the best of the best. Not even Rinzler held the same skill on the light cycle, Clu was good too. But neither could compare. Hate it though I might, there was something primal and powerful to the sound of thousands of voices screaming for you to win.

It was magnificent, in a horrible way. But more troubling was need for it, my overwhelming lust for the speed. The fact that I'd become so hungry for the chance the escape, that I'd gladly use the one thing I loved to murder those who didn't deserve it. When I was 'being good' I could expect to get a bit of mileage in a smaller arena that Clu had set aside for his champions, but it wasn't common.

He had a thing about letting other programs see me outside of the arena; a possessive sort of fear, as though I was a favored toy that he feared losing. So most of my time I spent locked away in my tower, mentally breathing fire and plotting my escape.

I exercised regularly, or as regularly as I could. Preparing for the day when I would escape, escape to where I couldn't tell you. To the waste lands beyond the grid perhaps, Flynn had often spoken of the potential there. Or perhaps to the Sea of Simulation. Another place that'd been mentioned often by him, a place of infinite creation; although from what I heard it had long since been poisoned by Clu in his bid to destroy the ISO's, A fact that often brought dark thoughts when I considered it.

The truth was; that regardless of what I did or where I went I would never escape the pain that drove me to push the limits. The pain that I lived with, despite all else.

Perhaps I would have been better off had I been in the company of close friends, but I wasn't. And I honestly didn't know what to do from here on. Not that there was much I could do; of the people I knew outside of the Grid, only Alan had knowledge of anything pertaining to Flynn's secrete project. And he would probably never think to look for me INSIDE of the damn thing.

I sprang upwards, cursing as I realized that I'd moved to slow as Rinzlers foot connected with my ribcage. I grunted as I hit the ground, rolling to lessen the impact my muscles bunched as a foot pinned me to the ground and I froze as a humming disk touched the back of my neck.

Close- but still not good enough. The foot was removed as Clu called out the end of our match, and I grimaced. It was hard to tell what would please Clu more sometimes.

I let out a sigh as I rolled over grabbing the hand that was offered. Odd though it might have been Rinzler always offered me a hand. A small action but a constant and steady one, despite the ruthless and sometimes downright brutal style of fighting that we often partook in.

Truth be told, Rinzler was ever the enigma to me, a man of many mysteries, that one. He seemed almost compassionate at times; giving more leeway than Clu ever would when he wasn't present. He even went so far as to give me extra energy when some days, regardless of the regulated amounts that I was given by the guards.

Which was to say, enough to give me the energy to fight Rinzler once a day (Or their equivalent of a day; which was to say about a minute, Real world time.) Yeah real world time conversions once I actually sat down and did them? A little shocking.

Rinzler's first directive I once found out, was to ensure my care and wellbeing. And he stuck to it with a zeal that was unwarranted and unmatched by any other program that Clu had re-purposed. And let me tell you, there were quite a few of them lately. But I digress.

He was always there, unless of course Clu needed a hunting dog or a gladiator. Always watching, helping, or in the case of our lessons, encouraging and so gentle at times it made me wonder. He was a silent guardian, but also a jailer.

Perhaps it had something to do with his initial programing? I couldn't dismiss it as a possibility really. He was often so attentive, that it bordered on fanaticism.

What was he like before being re-purposed? I'd obsessed about this for a long time now, but no answer had been forthcoming. Only the silent watching of my companion and the occasional odd purring that escaped when he was particularly pleased or worried.

Strange indeed.

An all too familiar pair of boots tapped against the floor as I attempted to brush myself off; dust as it were was an entirely real world problem as I'd come to find out. Well for the most part at least. I generated dust, because dust is usually bits of dead skin and what not that gathers en-mass. But I really didn't have to worry about getting my clothing dirty, since technically it wasn't clothing and there was no dirt to be had.

A slow clapping filled the air and I turned to look at the self-satisfied grin gracing Clu's face.

"Well done Miranda, very well done." Clu said, smiling in a way that made my skin crawl. It was his 'too pleased for your good' smile. The type of smile that said he'd back you into a corner you hadn't even noticed was there. "In fact, I believe that you've done well enough to have a bit of fun on the light cycles."

I felt a hint on thrill at the thought, before a wall of shame hit me. I pushed it away trying not to acknowledge it; I shouldn't be forced to live like this. Half dead in mind and heart, clinging to something so simple and base to distract me from the pain that tore at my heart.

I could not go on living like this, something had to give...

Or I would.

* * *

><p><em> Agon: Greek word for conflict. Also oddly enough, where we derive the first part of the word Agony from.<em>

_One More Thing…. IM BAAAAAAAACCCCCCCKKKKK._

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